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Are Your Battles Worth Fighting? The Importance of Choosing Your Battles Carefully
There are
things in life you deem important enough to enter fights or battles in order to
get them or keep them no matter what it costs you. But many of the battles of
your life are such that you enter without realizing what you are doing and
having any need to be part of. This happens because you can't control every
single event and person around you so you don't always get from others what you
like or expect or deserve. There are battles you choose to fight because the
victory is important to you since you believe in your cause and keep going regardless
of the obstacles placed in your way.
Just stop
for a moment and look back at the tasks that you have successfully completed up
to this time and ask yourself how many battles you had in those years behind
you and how many of them was really important. How many of them helped you to
move forward in your life?
Many of the
battles we fight on a daily basis are battles that have no purpose and do not
make sense at all. You are wasting your time and energy when fighting for
things that, even if they are won, leave you exactly where you have been or
even make you fall backward. You should exercise your powers only for good
reason, because trying to convince some idiot of your truth for example is a
battle that you are fighting in vain. When you are complaining about the
weather or allow yourself to get stressed because you are stuck in a traffic
jam and your row of cars is not moving fast enough you are wasting your energy.
Is it really important to retort when somebody addresses you with irritation and
with the obvious intention to hurt you by words he or she says out of temper?
Many of the
cases we choose to fight a battle that has no consequence to our lives is about
pride and sense of justice. You regard someone's words as a personal attack and
rush to defend yourself, but exercising your energy in that way will not bring
you any reward in your life. Regardless of the result of that battle the effect
of it is minimal or zero which means it is not an important battle.
So the most important word you should learn to
say is NO. When you
understand that you don't need to persuade every single person you know and
don't need to complain of the rain, you can lead your life more effectively,
because you can preserve your energy for the battles that are really important.
The first
step toward that is to realize that your battles are too many. You are wasting
too much energy on things that are not important and you can't accomplish what
is important because you get exhausted. If you don't realize this in time you
might push yourself too hard which can result in serious consequences like a
stroke for instance. Surviving a stroke makes people view things from a new
perspective. Those people learn what is important enough to be concerned with
and what is not. But you don't have to survive an illness in order to change
your perspective.
Just enjoy
your life while caring only for those who are really important to you. Don't
complain when the weather is bad, instead be grateful that you have legs to
walk in the rain and a healthy constitution so that you can suck in and fill
your lungs with the air refreshed by that rain.
Fight only
those battles that are really important and you will find that the battles you
are engaging in are very few. But those few are worth using all your capacities
and exercising all your powers in order to win them. Actually you keep fighting
as long as it is necessary because you are bent on winning them. Most of our failures are not the results of
our being incapable or weak. They are the results of our fighting too many
battles that are good for nothing so basically all we do is letting our
energy leak out.
Always ask
yourself: Do I REALLY have to fight this battle? Is it an important one? Does
it make any difference if I win? Does it contribute in any way to my happiness?
If not, let things be as they are. You
don't have to pick everything up that is put in front of you. Select what
battles are worth the fight for most people who try to involve you in a
quarrel only want your time and attention. But this is their battle, not yours.
If it has no place in your life, force yourself to say no and walk away
unruffled. Preserve your energy because you will need it when fighting for
whatever is really important to you.
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